As bookworm, we understand the power of a positive, or negative, review. But sometimes we find someone’s left a review that fails to be either. It’s just plain ODD!
So here we’ve listed a few of our faves, ranging from full on flaming to mildly inappropriate. And maybe you shouldn’t rely on these before make a purchase…
1. 10 points to Gryffindor if you can spot what’s wrong with this ‘City of Bones’ review:
“A very good read. A cross between Harry Potter and the Twilight series. Well worth getting into the series. They just get better and better.”
And that’s why they gave it 1 star…
2. This review of ‘Divergent’ is either a mistake, or we’ve all been doing it wrong:
“I have never ordered this game but if a “freebee” is on offer I am up for it and will review!”
No, no. ‘Divergent’ is not a game we want to play.
3. Shall we try again?
“Not me – I never ordered or received this book!”
Um. Ok, then. Thanks for sharing?
4. How is this even real? Who gets their Harry Potter’s mixed up?
“I went to school with a guy called Harry Potter. Since he also wore glasses I assumed it was his autobiography. If it was, he’s lying. Yes we all did mental stuff at our school but it was because we were on glue. And I wasn’t that wasted to think our headmaster had a white beard. He didn’t even have a moustache. Disappointing.”
Wow. Just wow.
5. Another slip of the mouse for ‘The Hunger Games’?
“Fantastic trilogy that was aimed at teenagers. Being a middle aged 50 something, I thoroughly enjoyed all 3 books and would highly recommend them”
They’re recommending them SO highly they’ve given it 1 star. *slow clap*
6. This is why recommending books to people is a tricky business, even when it is ‘The Hunger Games’:
“A friend recommended me this book. Needless to say, we are not friends anymore. Just don’t buy this book. A waste of money.”
Oof. Not a fan, then.
7. When you by ‘The Fault in Our Stars’ but just don’t get around to reading it:
“You are asking for a review far too early…..give me a chance to read it first!”
Yeah, Amazon! Give them a chance! Lol.
8. When you’ve got a tip for TFiOS author, John Green:
“I did not enjoy reading this book and I felt that the author could have widened the use of his vocabulary a little, all I kept reading was “he said…she said…I said…They said” even young children are taught not to do this.
What tense is this book written in, actually?
9. Why bother elaborating though? TFiOS in two syllables:
Welp, fair enough. It kinda is the hook of the whole book…
10. TFiOS literally cannot catch a break:
“I thought this book was rubbish because there is to much muck every where. i believed all the characters were going to die.”
A bit bleak, but sure.
11. This is just lucky! But still, only 1 star for TFiOS?
“Never ordered this but it arrived”
12. Oh, ‘Wuthering Heights’, a much loved classic, right?
“My stupid teacher made me read this horrible book. To all future teachers considering making this book required reading: well, don’t do it! My teacher has made the list. The list of death that is. ha ha ha haaaa
Oh dear… Hopefully that teacher is still alive and well…
Which of these “reviews” tickled you? Tell us in the comments below!
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